I've made a horrible discovery. It's information I wanted to have as soon as it should have been given to me, but something I had to wait and find for myself in the most painful way possible.
Perhaps I'm a fool who doesn't really understand how to function in life and what is or is not acceptable. Maybe my frustration and fear is invalid and I'm reacting in the worst way possible.
Perhaps I'm right to take this new discovery and burn in my own hatred and anger over it. I can feel my heart aching and burning. I can't tell if it's the pain of my new found knowledge or if it's the pain my body feels when I rage.
The life I was working towards, the life I thought I was living fairly comfortably, is no more. How do I approach the future? Where do I go from here?
The path to self-destruction, after all I've had to endure up to and including this, has never been more inviting. I'd like to set the world on fire and roll around in the embers after all is nothing more than fiery coals.
Perhaps I'll destroy myself. Perhaps I'll save myself. The future as always is uncertain, more so now than ever before.
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